Author Topic: War Stories, or: How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Ship  (Read 11022 times)

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Offline Lord LunaEquie is me

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You wanna know what I think?
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Yes!
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I think you're some kind of deviated prevert. I think General Ripper found out about your preversion, and that you were organizing some kind of mutiny of preverts. Now MOVE!

So, I haven't played TSSSF too many times as of yet, and most of the time it's been with my full collection of 500-some-odd cards, but every time the game has had some huge memorable moment.

Just such a moment occurred today.

So gather 'round, all you would-be shippers, with your rose-tinted glasses and your pints of love poisons, and listen to my tale of how the multiverse broke and all the fics burned.

First, we have the setup. Baka Senpai Discord had taken Twilight's place at the center of the fanfic universe. Three figures have emerged from the shadows at his will to write the stories that will shape our little ponies' destinies, and their love lives.

Before anyone knew it, 1/2 2/3 of a point had been won. Soon Senpai Flash Sentry-Kun and Nipon ni Naritai Twilight Sparkle joined Discord in the proto-world of fanfiction. Mr. Cake proposed to Mrs. Cake not once, but twice, as they practiced swinging, trying to find their place in the new order. The Mistress of Equality herself, Starlight Glimmer, briefly made an appearance to smack down all would-be points to less than 1, before being replaced outright by a strangely serene Fluttershy leading the worshipers of eldritch gods.

Somehow a T kept being made.

Then, things started heating up. Adjutant hit the board, sewing the seeds of chaos and rule-breaking that would soon follow as a single turn saw two goals won and five or six ships played. The board was misread (because someone kept thinking all Twilight Sparkles are seemingly princesses) and play passed to me. Senpai Flash Sentry-Kun, who had been happily engaged with Discord, soon found himself pet-sitting for Nipon ii Naritai Twilight Sparkle, and suddenly all Tartarus started breaking loose. With a combination of replace, search, copies, and forgetting that Adjutant's power couldn't be copied, I played Japanese Brad's power about 8 times, playing probably 15 ships in the process and gaining... 1 goal. No unicorns were played during this turn.

The board had grown once again, and it was time to cut it down to size. Derpy made an appearance, and another well-placed love poison saw the board nearly wiped, then with a few more ships, another T formed.

As turns went by, the discard piles grew considerably. When Mahou Shoujo Derpy cast her pretty spell over everyone, we knew it was the beginning of the end. The points were pretty tensely matched: 6, 8, and 9 2/3. The one behind in the race had a plan, though. With a well-placed search, Inconvenient Trixie found her way onto the field, immediately followed by a protective Rainbow Powered Maude Pie. By this point in the game, the room had become quite physically hot, and two out of three of us wanted the game to end. I knew what I had to do.

But I had not the power to do so. I emptied my hand, but for a single ship, winning three goals in the process and pushing me to fifteen points, but the game was still afoot. I drew seven ponies, hoping for a Search. I got a Copy, but I was in luck! There was a search on the board! Two turns remained.

A nearly-thought out Love Poison took Trixie out from underneath Maude's protective watch, but a miscalculation meant she was still sitting inconveniently on the field. A small chunk of the grid was gone. One turn remained.

As attempts were made to prolong the game, my opponents were unaware of my plan. A secondary plan was attempted, to bring the Mistress of Equality back, but I had ended up drawing it by accident. A few points were won in that last turn, but it was for naught.

As it comes back to me, I play the one ship I had to use the Copy, taking the Search power on the board, and doing the one thing you should never do: I combined a Bag of Holding with a Portable Hole.